Black Ribbon New Zealand
Ending Domestic Violence for Everyone!

Gender-based Violence (Men & Boys)

Men and boys can also be affected by gender-based violence whether it be committed by another man or by a woman. Like women, men and boys can also be victims of rape, forced marriage, or domestic violence by a family member, partner or spouse.

Men and boys make up approximately 39% of New Zealand's sexual violence victims, and approximately 40% of those victims were abused by their mother or another female relative.

The latest New Zealand based statistics available are from 2013, which report that:

  • 4.4% of men were likely to be the victim of a violent interpersonal offence by an intimate partner (est. 94,484).
  • 2.7% of men were likely to have experienced threats and damage committed by an intimate partner (est. 63,776).
  • 2.5% of men were likely to have experienced a physical offence committed by an intimate partner (est. 59,052).
  • 0.5% of men were likely to have experienced a sexual offence committed by an intimate partner (est.11810) .
  • 17% of men were likely to have experienced psychological violence (or abuse) committed by an intimate partner (est. 401557).

All forms of violence and abuse are completely unacceptable, regardless of the gender of the individual who is experiencing the violence, but in the wake of decades of social conditioning about toxic masculinity and male violence we need to be very clear that violence by women against men is widespread and consistently under-reported. There are indications that only about 10% of male victims of female violence report the incidents to the authorities, mainly due to taboos and fears of misunderstanding created by a culture of masculine expectations.

Domestic violence against men is made far more difficult to tackle in New Zealand because of a systemic discrimination against men in our society. Men fear losing their relationships, their homes, their children, and their social standing if they report the abuse and end the relationship. Without appropriate resources as backing, men flounder through systems that favour women and run the risk of losing everything - eventually ending up homeless and/or mentally exhausted and suicidal.

It's time for change. Ladies, we need to cut it out. For the sake of our partners, fathers, uncles, and sons - let's keep our hands to ourselves!